honestly? i have been wearing many hats lately. running a business..growing it..is lots and lots of hard worki am learning it is blood sweat and tears on my part and then letting God do His part which means the down time i do have is usually spent answering etsy convo's..planning the next days workload and putting something in my mouth to eat...cleaning house .. oh and i do find time to eat Mexican with my mom and girls!! i love Mexican food!!
it leaves little time to peruse my favorite blogs and leave comments answering back comments on my own blog all of which i miss terribly!!
but you know--it is part of growth. it is a season. for me..i know i cannot do everything- we aren't meant to. i can only do so many things and do them well so some things have to be set aside for a time. and i am learning not to feel false guilt or take on pressure that isn't mine to take...you know?
and that is ok!
and honestly... i passionately love what i am doing and where i am at right now
i feel like i have been given a second chance in life..i am feeling better and stronger than i have felt in years it has been a year april 28 since i had major surgery having my colon removed and a colostomy bag. since then, i had another surgery to create a new pouch that takes the place of my rectum made out of my small intestine ( crazy right ) and then april 21 i will have the last and final surgery where they will hook it up and remove the bag. while i am beyond grateful for this process, having a bag has been...life-alteringly HARD!! and while i am super duper excited to not have a bag i am aware there will be some months of healing and adjusting to the new way of doing things. it will be hard. but I AM READY:)
i will never be "normal" again. there will be things i won't be able to eat. there are some issues that pop up with jpouch's and energy levels always seem to be an issue and dehydrating but being on this side of severe ulcerative colitis and having such a poor quality of life i will take this anyday!!
God has been my rock..my strength. He chose me for my weakness...it has been through these hard places that i am willing to be teachable, by His grace, to be taken deeper into trusting Him
giving Him a real chance to prove Himself to me
i am trying to learn everything i can from this experience and one thing i have been practicing is LIVING BRAVE! to STOP DOING WHAT ISN'T WORKING..and figuring out why i keep going back
creating a new future - living day-tight as mark batterson says:)
nikki and i have so many things coming up--i have some fun news that i will share soon too:)
all of this being said PLEASE know i think of you all often. i do! it is the way i am made. i know those of you who pray with me..and for me and encourage me are part of the reason i am this far in the journey. i am SO looking forward to the next part of the adventure--and i think it really will be an adventure!!
if i am to tell my story...i have to be at that place to help others get out...so this season of my life is part of that story it is part of what i am to teach but i have to "live" it first...does that make sense?
ok...now for the winner!
we had 313 comments and random number generator choose 105
Ashley - ashmcferrin on ig -
i asked ONE thing you want to do this summer and Ashley said, " my kids have been begging to go fishing for the first time... so this summer i want to go fishing!....have fun Ashley..fishing is one of summers highlights:)...xo
whoo hoo girlie!! email me at email@example.com with your address and it is boxed and ready to come home:)