i am pregnant with a treasure of sorts…& a winner

i love weekends.  we have been savoring spending time together weekends.  NOT working.
like going to the plaza and walking around..shopping..eating lunch..laughing..sharing our hearts..making memories
this weekend we hit repeat–
we got to dress the part for fall.  it was crisp & sunny.
a perfect day for thrifting.

LOOK at my GUNS!!

later on in the day we met my with my aunt pat who is battling breast cancer for the second time and ate lunch with her and a bunch of my family
FAMILY..the most meaningful thing we have.  gifts given to walk with us through this life.  we laughed.  ate WAY to many rolls with cinnamon butter

and then met up at my mom’s house for dessert..brownies, mini cherry pies, pumpkin dump cake = a pound or so:/

after all that food speed shopping seemed like the answer so then headed to the mall so nikki could get some clothes for work
did i tell you she went back to work full-time?

well it is sunday now so we are going to waffle house for breakfast and then to the grocery store.
doesn’t everyone eat before the grocery store?
making a pit stop by the thrift store to pick up this crazy red hutch for my master bedroom redo..i tell ya!  i have lots of projects to finish up!

a new season is beginning for us so we are practicing living out of the “being content side”  LESS
VS.
the driven to “want more and never being satisfied” side MORE

i am beginning to see what a necessity establishing a flexible balance around my life is.  i am the only one who can GIVE that to myself.
i can’t wait to share these things with you as i learn!

i am pregnant with a treasure of sorts.  it is gestating quietly.  time will tell.  all i can say is thank you for praying for me and my family
there is a healing that only God can work in hearts.  i have labored in prayer for more years than i have fingers for.  some things in life there aren’t words for but God to come down.. work a
miracle for my family.  there were many things stolen from us years ago.  i was a perfect target and we were a growing blended family with not a clue
of what was about to hit us.  it was a perfect storm rolling in leaving in its path debris a rubble and i have spent many seasons since– like Job

but God–

LOOK at my GUNS!!

i am finding ways moving forward to live a beautiful life.
i can’t go back and change ONE thing.  nope, not one!
i can go forward and stop looking back though & begin to create something new..releasing the ashes to the only One that can bring beauty from them
so again…i can feel in my bones all of this up ahead.  waiting to be shared as love life lessons for those who are hurting
but first i know that i have to finish up what i have been given right now.

3 WEEKS until my surgery.  i have been battling fear and nightmares…i am not kidding!
last time was traumatic on me and my family.  but today i remembered the fear is false evidence appearing real…hmmmm

i am getting giddy with all the new things on the horizon though.  i want to be there so much.
but you know what?  i KNOW that God is saying...the lesson is here right now.  BE PRESENT!

live wide open within each day

LOOK at my GUNS!!

while this year has been one of the hardest years of my life–

 

it has also gifted me with so many valuable lessons
i have oodles of unfinished projects that i can’t wait to tackle
i have one more surgery after this one…the best and supposedly easiest one
part of my heart is in MN and i can’t wait to take grace and i back there this spring/summer
we have a whole new vision for the shop in january..one that is physically easier for me but i think so much better
with quicker turnaround times…

i am eager to be about curating my STORY

january is the beginning of a new year and the beginning of my slowing down and recording life lessons as
i begin connecting the sacred
in my heart
my home
and in all things handmade

now for the winner of the copy of the ART of WAR by steven pressfield is comment 17 — SARAH
email me sarah at tiffkilgore@live.com with your address and i have the book shipped out to you!

thank each and everyone of your for your comments!  i will be giving away my next read here soon so stay in touch:)

 

 

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Susan Jeffries - It sounds like your heart is headed in the right direction. I read a quote this morning that made me think of you. It stated, “Go forward with your eyes clearly focused on Him”. I often move forward without my focus being on God, and I am never certain of the direction I am supposed to take. I pray that you see His path in every step you take! Blessings! Susan

Glenda Childers - I am praying for your surgery. It is good that you are going in much healthier and rested.

Fondly,
Glenda

Jill @ Cora Anne Designs - Wow, what a full and joyful weekend! Enjoy the next week too!

Flower Patch Farmgirl - Beautiful! Always!
Praying for you, T.
His grace really IS sufficient.
xo

yolanda - Tiffini, I want to share with you today. I broke down and cried out today to God and asked for a breakthrough . I will admitt that since I lost the baby about 8 years ago and my only hope of being a mom I have been scared and in the desert of life. I asked God to welcome me home like the prodical and help me find my faith and hope . I am an extremely strong and private person but I am asking for your prayers and your friendship if possible to help me keep believing when I fall back at times. I am like you in that I think if I came back to my faith that he will use my struggles for helping others but I have find my way back myself.
I want to encourage you . I feel our struggles are similar in some ways.

Pam - It’s not faith until it’s been tested. And I guess we can say you are getting the test. And what I’m seeing is you are passing it, one day at a time. Besides FEAR being “false evidence appearing real”, I love this one: Face Everything And Recovery. That’s what you’re doing, we’re doing. When we face it with God there is no way we can lose. Praying for you as you face the days ahead. God is doing a great work in you now and in the days ahead. I just know it. :-)

Pam - Oops, that was Face Everything and Recover (not recovery).

LLH Designs - Sweet friend, I’ve been so “pregnant” and full with new dreams for our farm that I haven’t take the time to check in. But I think of you often, and as I read your post today, I literally thought about how far you’ve come even in the short time that I’ve been reading your story. God has brought you this far and will carry you all the way! Honored to bear witness to your story. xoxo!

why i chose to intentionally read again & a giveaway

source

one day i had an aha moment and i thought, ” i would love to read but i don’t have time anymore.”

 really?

i bit the side of my cheek..seems i do that when i am in heavy thought..or stressed and tried to recall my reading days and i remembered
when i was younger i would sit by the faint light of the bedside lamp until the wee hours morning when time was pushing down hard.
clock watching because i knew the babies would be up in several hours…hmmmm….just one more chapter.
in those days technology wasn’t a time thief

that very moment i made a commitment to myself
to read again because

books 

inspire
teach
shape
take us outside our comfort zone
convict
carve
grow
change
expand
rewrite
challenge

i have missed all of these things that books gave me.  i feel my mind slowing a bit with age.
NOTE TO SELF:  maybe picking up a book instead of my phone will help my mind to remember how to think

:::my commitment

one chapter a night.  period.
a funny thing happened
some nights i read a couple chapters

add those nights together and a book was finished–see what a little each day can do!
i am choosing to be impeccable with my word.  this is a practice.  a hard practice for me
but i am being filled with the gifts that books give.  and this is a good thing.


source

:::recently read books

book1

:::next in line books

book

are you a voracious reader?  maybe you too are a chapter a night girl…that’s ok
keep your word to yourself
keep the goal way small.  measurable.  something that doesn’t drive you..cause perfectionism to rear its ugly head

love does was recommended to me by a sweet ig friend whom i adore …xo
i am holding onto ann voscamps the greatest gift until the holidays….a treat to be sure!
and i am beginning one good deed a day on january 1, 2014…i thought it a perfect way to begin a new year..a new season..giving
the gifts of imperfection came in the mail today.  it will be after love does:)

:::giveaway

tell me one of you all time favorite books that changed your life and i will let random number generator draw out a winner
on friday and send you a copy of

:::my current reading book

the WAR of ART by steven pressfield

i smile as i write..put your thinking caps on.  this is hard yes?  ready, set — GO!

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Cat - When Bad Things Happen to Good People by Harold Kushner. This book made me see God as a father. I realized that He didn’t cause bad things to happen just as a parent with a child he is there for us to help us pick up thw pieces if our lives when th

Cat - When Bad Things Happen to Good People by Harold Kushner. This book helped me wrap my head around all the bad things that happen in the world and WHY God would let them happen if He loves us. I realized that He knows everything yet gave us free will just as any good parent does with their children. He allows us to fail. To fall. To suffer. He also is there for us when these things come to pass. To help us up. He loves us no matter what. When we need a soft place to land when things get tough He is there for us. Just as I am for my own children. He is God the Father.

Nancy W - I love to read and usually have at least three books going at the same time! 1000 Gifts would be one of the top favorites, it really helped me to look at things and find something to be thankful for everyday!

Castle - Just finished “Anything” by Jennie Allen – it seemed to mirror what I’ve been struggling with about letting go of everything (and what’s keeping me from letting go) and being able to say to God that I will do anything for Him.

Pam - Great post! Breaking Free by Beth Moore helped start a huge change in my life! I will be forever grateful to Beth and God for writing that book.

Becky J - The book Hinds Feet on High Places by Hannah Hurnard has impacted me like no other book, except the Bible…I first read it over twenty years ago…its heart is tackling our fears and walking closely with Jesus {told as an allegory}….your book list looks delightful..I have been devouring so many good books lately, too…aren’t we blessed!!

Alicia @ La Famille - its been harder to read since vera is sleeping in our room right now…but I miss it!!! I love historical fiction. love it!! the paris wife, call me Zelda, the literary society (that one with the super long title I can’t remember??), love historical fiction.

tara - morning friend.
i’m reading more in this season, too, and loving it.
used to read all the time.

right now, i’m reading bread and wine. have you read her book, bittersweet….took 8 pages of notes on that book. it reached down in me and stirred things up in a good way.

i couldn’t possibly leave my favorite book of all time….some really good ones::
Intercessory prayer by dutch sheets…
secrets of the secret place by bob sorge….
bittersweet by shauna niequist….

enjoyed blue like jazz by donald miller
want to read his book called through painted deserts.

so many books!!!

I’d love to read the one you’re giving away!

Flower Patch Farmgirl - Three cheers for books! I stayed up last night until almost 1a.m. reading a book that I don’t even really love. ??? But still, I heart books!

I want to read Cold Tangerines and Love Does. All your reads look up my alley!

Denise Hunt - A game-changer for me was “Animal, Vegetable, Miracle” by Barbara Kingsolver. It forever changed the way I looked at food, preservation, and eating locally & seasonally. I highly recommend it!!

Victoria - I am an on again off again reader and have been for the last few years. I really enjoy reading but I have to feel like a book is wotrth it. After a very busy winter (strange thing to say…) I got back into reading with “The Help” this spring. That was such a GREAT book that it made me hungry for more. I’ve joined goodreads and pretty much ALWAYS have at least one book going at a time now. I’ve been so excited that it’s actually caused me to spend less time on the internet and even on movies/tv. Win, win.

I just finished “I Dared to Call Him Father” , so I’ll be starting another soon.

Diana - 1000 Gifts put into words what I have always felt was so important in my Christian walk!
Have shared with as many friends as I can. A read for everyone!

Sarita - In my long life I have read thousands of books. So I will pick the latest book that changed my life. Ann Voskamps.”one Thousnd Gifts. How could this NOT change a life. I have sent the book to friends also. I do read until early morning hours! Thank you for a chance to win a book…

Heather - Love Does is awesome! Bob Goff is so inspiring.

Patty Page - I’d have to say Anne Voskamp’s One Thousand Gifts and it’s about time that I re-read it.

Ddori - The book of Psalms. There are so many lessons to be learned there. Thanks for the chance to win!

Sarah - I loved “Expecting Adam”…I love to read but as a mom of two little ones it’s hard to find the time! I’m anxious to read “cold tangerines” and “the greatest gift”! Thank you for your inspirational posts! Love to read them!

Dana at Happy Little Lovelies - Gosh, to pick one….there are a lot of favorites, but I would say my most recent great read was Bittersweet by Shauna Niequist. Reading Bread & Wine now. Love.

Kathy - Love your books mentioned, I have read many of them and have some on my list to read. Life changing book for me in the last year was Seven by Jen Hatmaker! I think I will have to reread!

Kerrie - The Book Of Hours by Thomas Merton is my favorite book. I re-read and re-read. Deep Unto Deep by Dana Candler another life changer. And Bob Sorge”s Secrets Of the Secret Place is one that i re-read.

Vanessa - Changed my life: you are already amazing.

jennifer dvorak - Crazy Love by Francis Chan- AMAZING!!!!

the journey of a lifetime & shop closing

i believe this post is what this post is all about.  it is about letting go of my way & grabbing hold of His.  simple surrendering but it isn’t really simple.
i have been playing with taking a break from the sign shop for months now but Resistance = Fear causes me to pick it back up.

cuff

i am worn out from listening to the voice that always tells me i can’t.  i am crazy.  you can’t write.  you can’t teach.  that is pipe dream.  that is so prideful.
what will you do for money.  you can’t….it sits on my shoulder and nags and nags and little by little…kills me.  stops the call from ever happening

and i will die without truly living my calling if i don’t shut it down.  now.  for such a TIME as THIS!

 

the more important a call or action is to our soul’s evolution, the more Resistance we will feel toward pursuing it
–steven pressfield – the art of war

:::::::::::

you see i am torn between signs and writing my heart.  i don’t have time for both

and the good thing is winning over the better thing.

i LOVE the inspiring and motivating part of sign making.  LOVE the words but i do not love all the labor & time it takes from me
and my family
and most importantly from God and the calling he has planted in me.  

the work has taken over our lives and leaves no room to breathe
i am humbled that so many are blessed by what we do…i am!  it is God’s work surely!

but sometimes we have to lay down something that looks so good for something better
you see i have a heart pull that i have had since a child.  i know that it is time to put action to it.  time is ticking.  i am choosing to
do it afraid.  daring to live greatly in the arena

we do have something unfolding in God’s hands right now and since my next surgery is scheduled for october 29
we will be closing the shop on monday october 8 until january.

::::::::::::::::

a FULL life in the emptiest of places.  pursuing a FULL life.  now that sounds right to me.  for me.

my life will begin to glow in the darkness, my shadowed life will be bathed in sunlight
i will always show you where to go..I will give you a full life in the emptiest of places
–isaiah 58:10

mn14

because i have read halfway through my own book and i am worn weary.
from deep cavernous places guttural howls break forth.  incoherent because there are no words.
it has lived in my bones.  my marrow.  my breath.  suffocating me in a slow death until i DO SOMETHING with it! this calling
my calling…ok there.  i said it

i am all packed and ready for the next leg of the journey
the one in which i will test the words of steven pressfield’s book
–the war of art

wanna come with?  oh i do hope so for i think it will be a grand adventure
because i think we will have awesome news to share jeruselum?…wink:)

have you read it?  you need to because we are going deep!

i will leave you today with words from mary oliver

tell me
what is it
you plan
to do with
your ONE
wild and
precious
life

i only have one life to live
do i really want to live it hurrying after things
that won’t matter in the end?

are YOU willing to die having NOT lived..or are YOU willing to die LIVING?  decide!

or do i want to live full faced before a God
trusting Him at His word
to see the beauty that only He can bring forth from ashes of hopelessness?

baglady

Wake up, LORD, Robe yourself with strength!  Rouse yourself  as in the days
of old when you slew Egypt, the dragon of the Nile.  Are YOU not the SAME today,
the one who dried up the sea, making a path of escape when you saved you
people..
–Isaiah 51:9-10

 

 the victory is in the surrender….xo

 

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kerrie - my life will begin to glow in the darkness, my shadowed life will be bathed in sunlight
i will always show you where to go..I will give you a full life in the emptiest of places
–isaiah 58:10

This speaks so much to me…it is true. I am living it. In the emptiest of places is life. “This is the rest with which You may cause the weary to rest, And , This is the refreshing; Yet they would not hear” (Isaiah 28:12) I am happy to hear you are surrendering(I have been waiting) because I know it is what you are to do too. He is waiting. Let Him take care of you…He will be gracious (Isaiah 30:18-26) “Then He will give the rain for your seed…” I love you

Becky - I know exactly what you’re feeling. I struggle with wanting to do this thing God has blessed and wanting to do the thing my heart longs to do. Trying constantly to find the balance. Praying your soul pours out and that He fills it to the brim. Btw got my sign yesterday girl. Love it so much. Thank you!!!

Rhiannon - Oh dearest dahling, I HOPE you are truly okay with your decision to close the shop for awhile. Only YOU and your family know what’s best, and if that’s what you need to do to for now, please make sure to actually accept that. I am sure it was a tough one, but you have to first take care of yourself. I think of you often and wonder how things are going. I hope your surgery is not of a complication, but one that you knew you were going to have to do at some point. Big hugs and be well!!!!

Philippians 4:19 – But my God shall supply all your need according to his riches in glory by Christ Jesus.

Jaime scott - I love reading your words. They resonate deep within me and give hope and life. You have a beautiful gift. Go for it!!

Sarita - Congrats on having up coming surgery! Listen quietly,listen calmly,listen deeply to Gods word for you…you know what Hes saying.. :-)

Leslie - Bless you, girl! I had no idea when I ordered my first sign, it might be my last! Thankful for the “hallelujah” and praying for you!

Pat - I’m glad you’re following your heart! I understand that this has been a difficult decision, however, doing this in faith is a huge step and I applaud you!

I emailed you re: receipt of “Glinda” ~ totally thrilled!!!

Have a wonderful day!
xo
Pat

tara - your words always reach down deep in me.
grateful to watch your story with him unfold.

THE MORE IMPORTANT A CALL OR ACTION IS TO OUR SOUL’S EVOLUTION, THE MORE RESISTANCE WE WILL FEEL TOWARD PURSUING IT
–STEVEN PRESSFIELD – THE ART OF WAR

I’m facing my own resistance in an area…feeling stuck.
Your willingness to surrender and get before him daily is a challenge to me….and an inspiration.

Suzanne - Tiff, you inspire me to dig
down and take a leap, too.
I wonder what you are planning
to do with your one wild and
precious life???

The Steven Pressfield quote is
absolutely spot on in my case,
as well. Need to tack that one
up and fight the good fight against
that resistance!

Hope you are enjoying this
glorious day. What a gift these
autumn days are….

xo Suzanne

Deb - I can relate so much for what you are saying. If you follow your heart then you are doing the right thing. You do have a gift with words and they touch so many. You can do whatever you want to do. Look how strong you are! Many blessings to you and best wishes on your upcoming surgery. xo Debbie

Jill @ Cora Anne Designs - Oh Tiffini, I’m so happy for you and this new adventure you’re seeking. Life here on earth is WAY too short to not live every bit of it to the fullest. So excited to follow along on your journey!

xoxo,
Jill

Lemonade Makin' Mama - It’s really hard to let go of fear… you can do it though. If it weren’t possible… He would have never commanded it. Go do it sweets!

carissa fox - thrilled for you & your next chapter!!!
I pray it brings you all the peace & joy your soul craves.
it will.
it will.

I read your words several times through…
oh how they speak to me… to so many.

one thing is for sure… He gifted you with the talent of sharing.
sharing your heart… showing your true face… letting it out…
and touching us all the while.

your beauty shines so bright tiffini.
intoxicatingly wonderful really.
i’m in awe…
inspired to flex my inner spirit muscle.
:)

thank you for sharing your gifts.
He gave you many… I can only imagine His smile.
:)

paige - i am always inspired by you!! praying for you!!
now…off to order my sign
xoxo

be brave in love – lisa leonard

i guess i am kind of a weirdo.  when i close my eyes and imagine my dreams instead of hollywood i imagine
feeling the wind,water & tears on my face and the goosebumps as the red sea closed in and won the heroine in one of the most epic stories ever written!

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and if i had to close my eyes and click my heels..ok it might not be glittery red stilettos maybe more like a pair of worn in converse–i would wish

that i would be BRAVE in love

can i be transparent with you?  can i take a risk here?

ok..i want to cup my hands and whisper it in your ear because it is a gift.
ready?

…i want to live an epic story…

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one where God is my Author.  He is the Hero…i am the heroine.  that is my fairy tale still…at 45

there.  i said it out loud.  hit publish now let me go and hide in my closet.
do you ever feel like that when you are taking a risk and being brave?

like maybe you shouldn’t have said that and you replay the words over and over in you mind and
mentally abuse yourself…yeah.  i know that scenario all to well.

well let me let you in on something i am learning.

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the characters in the stories in the bible are just like you and me
i believe the main difference in their stories and ours is that they

lived life afraid.  the did life afraid.  they were courageous.  they were BRAVE
they were vulnerable.  they took risks loving and being LOVED by God..it was hard stuff.  read it for yourself

but the experiences they had…they motivate to this day.
one of my favorite things about the Bible is that it is alive.  the words are LIVING words
they have power and i can’t get enough of that.

P.S.  the Hero always wins in the end

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i put that wish on a necklace

to get your Brave in LOVE necklace from one of the bravest and transparent women i know..my sweet friend Lisa Leonard click here.  i love mine.  i might just have to have it tattooed on myself;)

**all images are by my daughter nikki:) and the pregnant model is my little sister who is expecting her first baby in a little over 5 weeks..talk about brave in LOVE!

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Kelly Cach - Gosh, I love your words. His words.
And perfectly dreamy photos to represent your dream :)
May yours come true!

Debra @ MsMoozys Open House - Thank you for sharing a piece of your heart with all of us here. Have a blessed day! :-)

tara - i wanna live an epic story, too.
one filled with authenticity….and vulnerability without shame.

he’s writing it for us..we just need to continue walking in it.

Lemonade Makin' Mama - Girl, just love your heart.

a ladder, a frame, leaves…& calling it good

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i love my grey ticking comforter.  especially on the first night the temps fall to 50.
windows open and i snuggle down deep.  the sleep is good in the crisp night air.

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SIMPLE – natural - not fussy …something that will carry us through until christmas is my gig
i am slooowly transitioning our home to feel more cozy & warm

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here is a little peek–before we get into more serious matters of the heart later this week…;)

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sending you each love & peace today..it is a brand new day–be present..xo

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heather - It looks so cozy Tiff, I just love it!!

Lemonade Makin' Mama - I love it all! (And love that little peek of my towel!) Happy FALL sweetie.

tara - Oh, it’s beautiful!
I can’t wait to see more…..

My fall decorations are super simple this year, too.

Hope your week is filled with grace…..praying for you.

Holly Farr - Simplicity at its best! Love it! (I might have to use your vignette as inspiration)

Flower Patch Farmgirl - Gorgeous pics, as ever! You always inspire me with your unfussy, simple, warm, way.

Sarita - Lovely..

arod - looks lovely so far happy fall

susan@avintagefarmwife - Everything looks so pretty, Tiffani!

Susan Jeffries - I love your new design! The blog looks great! I hope that your dr appt went well this week – saw it on IG. Prayers to you friend! Susan